Have a day, Joey Gallo.
If one end of the spectrum at the All-Star Break is Juan Gonzalez with 101 RBI (1998) or the Rangers sitting on a 4.5-game lead and having already pulled off the Cliff Lee trade (2010), then somewhere hanging around the other end is Texas, owners of baseball’s worst win-loss mark, setting an all-time big league record of 50 players used before the Break, a feat the club achieved yesterday when Ryan Feierabend (the Rangers’ 28th pitcher, not counting Mitch Moreland or Chris Gimenez) entered with two outs in the seventh, managing to close out one of only two innings all game that the Rangers were able to keep the Angels off the board.
Texas fell for the 22nd time in 25 games, the worst skid of that length in the franchise’s 43 seasons (matching a 25-game stretch in the club’s inaugural 1972 campaign), but even with a win on Sunday the club would have claimed baseball’s worst record heading into the Break, and until the last three weeks I would have never believed I’d be writing that — though, on the other hand, it’s impossible right now to imagine there’s another team playing less inspired or less inspiring baseball.
But while the game that counted on Sunday featured Scott Baker and Adam Rosales and Daniel Robertson and Feierabend, and Gimenez on a day when Robinson Chirinos was in the lineup too, one that didn’t count for anything 990 miles to the north featured the following 80-grade analysis, chronologically, and mostly on Twitter:
David Lennon (Newsday): “Rangers 3B prospect Joey Gallo is hitting BP homers completely out of the stadium here. Sick power.”
Jim Callis (MLB.com): “Joey Gallo just put on the best BP show I’ve ever seen at a Futures Game. Or, really, anywhere.”
Keith Law (ESPN): “Joey Gallo with a moderately impressive BP session. #holycrap”
Josh Norris (Baseball America): “One ball went so far, in fact, that it cleared the stands and shattered the window of a pick-up truck meant for the winner of the upcoming Home Run Derby.”
David Cameron (FanGraphs): “Who would be against adding Joey Gallo to the HR Derby tomorrow? No one, right?”
Jayson Stark (ESPN): “One more on Joey Gallo’s awesome BP show, from a scout: ‘If he were in that (Derby) tomorrow night, I think I’d pick him to win it.’”
Joe Hamrahi (Baseball Prospectus): “I think I may prefer to watch an afternoon of Joey Gallo BP than the actual Futures Game.”
Jason Parks (Baseball Prospectus), asked which of Gallo and Cubs prospect Kris Bryant has more power: “Only [Giancarlo] Stanton comes close to Gallo.”
Parks, asked if he was really suggesting Gallo has more power than Stanton: “I think it’s very close. I’m not kidding.”
Ben Badler (Baseball America), just before the start of the game: “Joey Gallo hitting fifth. Would anyone be opposed to doing this minor league spring training style and letting him lead off every inning?”
Callis: “[Reds prospect Jesse] Winker then pointed to the video board atop third deck in RF. ‘I’d like everyone to take a moment to reflect,’ he said, ‘that Joey Gallo came two rows of seats from hitting that Jumbotron out there. Unbelievable.”
Nick Cafardo (Boston Globe): “Rangers 3b prospect put on a power show in BP and has just hit a 419-foot homer to right to give USA 3-2 lead in Futures Game in Minny.”
John Manuel (Baseball America): “Joey Gallo lives up to the hype . . . loooong home run to right and a [Korean Baseball]-worthy bat flip to punctuate it. Have a freaking day Joey Gallo.”
Jay Jaffe (Sports Illustrated): “Joey Gallo: Holy launch angle porn.”
Callis: “After electrifying the Target Field crowd — and damaging a Chevrolet pickup truck on the concourse behind the right-field stands — during batting practice, Gallo struck out in his first two Futures Game at-bats. But he made the most of his third opportunity, unleashing a two-run homer in the bottom of the sixth inning to give the U.S. team a 3-2 lead that held up for its fifth straight victory. The announced distance on Gallo’s home run was 419 feet, which several press-box observers thought was too conservative.
“As impressive as Gallo’s Futures Game-winning home run may have been, it paled in comparison with the show he put on in batting practice. He led all players with 15 home runs, many of the tape-measure variety. He reached the third deck in right center with his first swing and hit five more balls there. He also hit three blasts to right field that carried completely over the stands and onto the concourse, including one that smashed the windshield of a pickup truck.
“[Said Gallo, who was named Futures Game MVP, of the BP shot everyone’s talking about:] ‘I heard I broke a windshield, and I do feel bad about that.’”
Badler: “Does anyone have a cigarette?”